The Toxic Subtext of “Charge what you’re worth.”

There’s a lot of trash talk on the internet. And I’m not talking about quippy one-liners or even cyber-bullying… not in this post, at least.

I’m talking about the toxic positivity, fake it til you make it, grind all day quotables that internet entrepreneurs pass of as personal development.

I want to continue with a little caveat: I love personal development. It is a worthy category in anyone’s life and helps people become more self-aware, actualized, and confident. I have poured into the recommended reading, listened to hours of webinars and Instagram Lives and I’ve noticed myself become a stronger person because of it. IMHO, I believe much of the community does good. However, there are a few quotables that get thrown around, adopted by the whole community without unpacking their impact.

So let’s take a look at a select few of my least favorite catchphrases in the personal development / entrepreneurial space, shall we?

“Charge what you’re worth.”

This one has got to be one of my least faves and while there are so many others that I could (and will in future posts) unpack, we’re starting here.

I heard this for the first time about three years ago (I can’t remember where). A warm vibration shot down my chest to the pit of my stomach and I felt my shoulders square up. Validation, empowerment, and a sense of possibilities swirled in my head. I charged forward with those words guiding me.

And yes, my paychecks increased year over year until I finally capped out at the top of the range for my job. Even so, the service industry doesn’t pay for Bali vacations or West Elm furnished lifestyles, even at the manager level.

Tying Human Worth to Money

I think the fallacy of these words split me like lightning cleaving a tree when I was interviewing a young college student. She was smart, dialed in, and had a great resume behind her. I wanted to scoop her up fast. As we chatted, I noticed her hand resting on a little belly bump and she volunteered, “I’m having a baby soon and I need to be able to support us both.” Reasonable, I thought. Then she said it.

“I want to be paid what I’m worth.”

Two thoughts instantly warred in my mind:

Your worth has nothing to do with money! and We definitely don’t pay enough.

I knew with 100% certainty that what we offered even for team leaders wouldn’t cover the bills. And I realized something that still depresses me: we have somehow fuzed “worth” and “personal value,” in a follow-your-passion-so-you-can-cash-in subculture.

To follow that line of logic to its conclusion… the more you make, the more valuable you are… the lower your pay, the less your presence matters, the more replaceable you are. So what does it say to the dedicated employee, working long hours, always bringing their best to work but still isn’t earning enough to live on?

Greater Value than Money

So the underpaid workforce, acting out of complete necessity, fueled by Instagram and TikTok entrepreneurial-type influencers, is demanding higher paychecks. They’re tired of juggling a job and a couple of side gigs to make ends meet, wondering when they’ll be able to reap a reward for their hard work. Employers are starting to catch up to inflation, hands forced in the light of The Great Resignation, but there is still a long way to go. Basic needs should be met. It shouldn’t be a question of your skillset, level of education, creativity, or some x-factor.

Humans’ are worth respect. Humans are worth compassion. Humans are worth your time. Humans are worth happiness.

Humans’ worth never equals money.

I’m not saying workers should accept being underpaid. On the contrary, I’m saying that they should be paid better because no one can make it on average wages anymore. But your “worth” isn’t a number. When are we going to quit assigning numbered values to people? Paychecks, weight, likes, upvotes, how much your Ninja air fryer costs… Can we just stop now?

People are more important than that. We transcend those qualifiers.

Something about that phrasing just rubs me the wrong way.

I think the intention of this mantra is to have confidence when quoting your rates to a client or during salary negotiations with your boss, but it’s gotten twisted. I went through a season where I constantly felt guilt and shame for not earning more money, even though I gave my absolute best effort every shift.

I grew increasingly frustrated, stuck in a job that didn’t pay enough and demanded so much of my time that I couldn’t even entertain the idea of a second job. I was worth more than that.

Companies should pay more, period. And we need to realize people aren’t numbers.

Conclusion

The takeaway here is to know your worth outside of a number. While of course, you should be paid a fair wage, your paycheck and your worth are two completely separate ideas. Whether that number is a dollar amount, a follower count, or the number of likes you get on a post, that does not measure the value of your soul. You’re unique and rare and your worth is more meaningful than money.

Think about catchlines wrapped up in cheap empowerment dressing before you subscribe. Just because someone looks put together on the internet doesn’t mean they have it all figured out. And beware the gurus bestowing guidance.